Why We’re Downsizing Our Family Home—And How We Knew It Was Time
This is the first post in my deeply personal Downsizing, Decluttering, Detaching, and Dreaming Ahead series—our heartfelt journey of letting go, lightening up, and listing our beloved family home.
We built our family home from the ground up, and oh, the stories these walls could tell! When the framing went up, we had the kids choose Bible verses, and we all went to the job site as a family to write Scripture on the wood. That cozy breakfast room? It’s where we had family devotionals. And that little working stage? It saw more plays and musical performances than I can count. 💕
But now? It’s just the two of us… rattling around in a house that once bustled with activity. Taking care of a yard and pool that no one uses. Our kids are grown and gone—none of them live nearby, and that’s okay. They’re all living amazing lives, walking in faith, and thriving. We are so proud of them and love nothing more than visiting them in their native habitats.
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We’re spending too much time and money maintaining a home that no longer fits the life we’re living now. We want to travel more. Visit our kids. Try new things. And to be honest, we want to spend less time dealing with the pool, the yard, and cooling and heating an upstairs no one uses! Continuing to do those things simply isn’t good stewardship of our money.
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While we’ll always cherish the memories we made here, it’s time to make space for a new season. We’ve signed with a great realty team, and we’re making final preparations to put the house on the market later this month. It’s time to right size our home and our lives for this season.
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It was not an easy decision—but we knew we would “know” when the time was right. There have definitely been tears involved—but this decision is the right one for us. We want this beautiful home to bless another family, just like it’s blessed ours.
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If you’re an empty nester walking through this too, I see you. Letting go of a home can feel like letting go of a chapter. But I believe the best stories keep unfolding. ❤️
Have you downsized or thought about it? I’d love to hear your heart in the comments.
Want to follow along with every step of this downsizing adventure? 🏡 To read the rest of the posts in the series, click HERE.
Thank you for sharing this. I plan to do the same in a couple of years- my biggest question is where to move? I will be interested to hear what you all have decided .
Pam,
That was us, too! We interviewed multiple realtors and talked with them about being “full service.” We wanted a realtor or a group of realtors that was just as committed to helping us find the right next home as they were to selling our existing home. Not only that, but we wanted them to be able to help us if there was an interim period when we needed temporary housing. We are really pleased with our choice!
Thanks so much for taking the time to leave a comment!
xoxo
Suzy
We have talked about it as well. We have a large pool that my hubby maintains. We still use it (well the dog uses it every day, he loves to fetch and being in the pool is his jam!). We know we will down size sooner rather than later. It’s hard to leave the neighbors, the location and where to go?
My hubby says he will retire in 2 years and then we will really consider it!
Can’t wait to see where you go from here!
Marilyn,
You’ll know when the time is right, and you’ll want to find a realtor or a realty team that is familiar and connected in the area you’re interested in. Even though it’s two years away, I would encourage you to start cleaning out and decluttering your cabinets, closets, and attics now. It took us a while, and we were so glad we gave ourselves plenty of time.
Thanks so much for leaving a comment!
xoxo
Suzy
I am torn between having a “home” space for everyone to land when they want/need to, but like you, feel like we are caring for a space that is costly and that is rarely used. Such a hard decision, we’ve included our daughter in these discussions, too, and that has helped shed some light.
Terri,
It’s a big decision, for sure. We did talk with all of our children for a few years before we moved forward. With two of our three children married, it didn’t feel right to hold onto a house that wasn’t the right size for us just for the holidays.
It’s a very personal decision, but we felt like this one was the right decision for us. Our kids are supportive! It’s good you’re talking about it now!
Thanks so much for your comment!
xoxo
Suzy
We too looked. Come very close to buying our longed for lake house. But then at the last minute decided we weren’t ready yet to give up our current home. Yes it is a lot to keep up (built in 1860) but we do use it all. We too think we will know when the time is right, God’s hand will be in it
Linda,
I couldn’t agree more! We knew the Lord was showing us this was the right time – for the reasons I mentioned in this post, but also for several, more personal reasons that I didn’t share here. He will show you!
Thanks for sharing your story with me!
xoxo
Suzy
I was excited to read your post because that is exactly where we find ourselves in this season of our lives. We have been in our home for 30 years and it is where our 3 kids grew up. But now all of them live in different states and there is no reason for us to stay here. It is bittersweet, yet exciting. Like you said, we enjoy visiting them in their environment, and also having the flexibility to do other traveling as well. The question is….where to move? Do we base our decision on being close to grandkids or move somewhere totally different that might hold a special appeal? These are questions we have been grappling with and which so far remain unanswered. I look forward to hearing more of your story as it unfolds!
Regena,
That is a big part of the decision, for sure! Bob and I are not close to retiring, so we knew we needed to stay nearby for the time being. The retirement decision can come later. Currently, we simply need a home that is the right size for us and suits our desired lifestyle. Freeing ourselves from the maintenance and expenses of this house will allow us to do that, and we’re excited about that!
Thanks so much for sharing and taking the time to leave a comment! More posts to come about our journey!
xoxo
Suzy
I understand, completely, the feeling of needing to downsize at a certain age and stage! My husband (82), and myself (71), built our dream home 26 years ago. Like yours, Suzy, it is a very large custom built beauty. We have discussed downsizing but both desire to stay in our beloved home until they carry us out feet first! LOL! Our home is paid for and we could not find a home in a more beautiful setting than what we have here. We are blessed to have many wonderful people who help us maintain our 3 acres now that my husband is unable to mow. Our resident birds and deer would miss us as we would them. Everyone must decide for themselves if downsizing is right for them, and, as you said, when they know is the time to do so, but it isn’t something everyone must, or wants to do. I look forward to your journey with great interest, and I am sure you and your husband will make many beautiful memories wherever you land.
Josephine,
I LOVED your story! Thank you for sharing it. Your home sounds divine! (Maybe Bob and I should just move in with you! 😂😉)
Downsizing isn’t right for everyone! Bob and I have properties on Sanibel Island in Florida and also in Waco, and we long to spend more time in those locations, as well as more time visiting our kids who are in Fort Worth, Chicago-area, and NYC! Right now, freedom is what we need! No retirement decision needed yet, but this is the right move for us right now.
It’s such a personal decision!
Thanks so much for your kind words and for following along.
xoxo
Suzy
Suzy, you and Bob are welcome to join us!!! Our guys would have alot to talk about as my husband is also a physician. We had a home in Mirmar Beach, Florida, that we contemplated retiring to, but my husband was still practicing until he was 78, then, he experienced 3 life threatening medical emergencies, one while we were in Florida, and it changed EVERYTHING. Unsure if he would ever recover enough to make the trip back and forth to Florida from our home in Oklahoma, or be able to enjoy the beautiful beach again, we felt forced to sell. It broke our hearts to do so, we loved our home there so much, but him getting critically ill there, away from all our trusted medical comrades, was a scary, and sobering experience for me( he, of course, remembers nothing about it). So that is another reason we are not moving, our daughter is 7 miles away from us here and we are more than co?forted to have our medical team right here, things often not taken into consideration when older and planning life changes. My husband is much better now, thank a very merciful God, and selling our Florida home was a huge financial win so it all worked out for the good, as promised in His Word. I know your future plans will also be mightily blessed.
Josephine,
I’m so happy your husband has recovered and you can enjoy your daughter and this precious season together!
Thank you for your sweet response! Yes, HE is always faithful to work everything out for our good if we loosen our hands and let Him have control of every aspect of our lives. That’s what we’re doing, and He is faithful!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy, yes, we did do this about 10 years ago. We downsized or “right-sized”, and it was both amazing and incredibly challenging. However, the pandemic came along, and our daughter gave birth to twins in Washington state. So we moved again! But because it was 2020 and there were so many restrictions, the only house that was available was a very large one! Fast forward to now, five years later, we are considering downsizing again, for all of the reasons you and your readers shared. I wish you the best of luck, and I know it will be a grand success. xo Suzanne
My Sweet Friend!
I’ve missed you and loved following your journey through all of these adventures. I love that you’re with your family and yet still traveling and enjoying your time together! I loved watching you all on GMA and I’m so glad you’re still doing your podcast and traveling!(Florence was amazing!!!)
Please, please, please, will you have me on again? 😊 I miss visiting with you!
xoxo
Suzy
Thank you Suzy! I miss you too! Everything is great and busy! I would love to have you back on Travel Connections – We have a lot to catch up on! xo Suzanne
Suzanne,
Thank you! I’m so excited! I’ll be in touch!
xoxo
Suzy
Suzy, we right-sized about five years ago. When we were planning, we really thought about how we start and end each day—and what’s most important to us.
A one-story home was key. We wanted something easy to live in—not just for now, but with the future in mind.
We love to walk – so a neighborhood we could walk in.
We also knew we didn’t want a pool, but plenty of green space was a must for the grand-dogs to come visit. We learned a long time ago that to truly welcome our kids, we had to welcome their dogs, too.
And a big circle drive out front —everyone needs a place to park and feel at home.
Now, we have grandchildren who visit, and I’ve converted two closets into sweet little nurseries so each baby has a cozy place to sleep.
It was helpful to think about our days and how we like to spend them—and then find ways to incorporate what’s truly important to both of us into choice for our home and neighborhood.
Sometimes, living on a golf course can give you that beautiful green view—without the upkeep of a large yard. Or a small courtyard with a bird feeder can bring in the birds. It doesn’t have to be big to be wonderful.
So excited for you!
Maggie,
I love the way you all looked at moving and how you were so intentional about what you wanted in your next home! We’ve been very thoughtful about it too, and I’ll be sharing more in future posts in this series! I loved your insight!
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your wisdom!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy, we right-sized two years ago by moving into a newer home with a layout that fits us more. It was lots of hard work, but it has proven to be such a good thing for us. We were able to re-imagine what we needed, and God has provided blessings and growth for us. I encourage you to focus on your goal, as the work to get there can feel overwhelming. It’s worth it.
Dana,
Your encouraging words were such a blessing to me. Thank you! We will press on with expectancy for the wonderful things God has planned for us!
Grateful for you.
xoxo
Suzy
Thank you so much for sharing this part of your journey! I look forward to the rest of the series you plan. We recently purchased a second home about two hours away that we’re currently considering as a “vacation home”. We are giving ourselves a year to decide if we want to sell our current house (been here for 37 years and raised our two kids here; they all live in different states now). I’m trying my best to make the new house feel like home but it seems it truly won’t until we actually live there more regularly (or permanently). I’m already going through the “I’m going to miss…” phase – looking out the kitchen window and seeing the birds on the feeders, my reading nook, my private area. But I know that God sent us in this direction and He will guide us in our decisions. I’m holding on to faith in His plan. Best wishes as you and Bob move forward to the next phase in your lives.
Helen,
Thank you for sharing your journey with me! I think the thoughtful and deliberate way you’re going about this is just fantastic. I think missing things in the house you’re saying goodbye to is part of it, for sure. However, I’m open to growth and change, and we, like you, have carefully considered and prayed about our decision.
Trusting the Lord for our next chapter!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy,
We’ve been busy as the sandwich generation the past five years, and still at it. We’ve got our older daughter educated and recently married. Now the younger daughter just needs to wrap up her last year of law school so we’ll have both off the parent payroll. We’re putting our 5500 sf home on the market this fall and will move to our recently purchased lake house early in the new year once the husband retires.
Can’t forget the older generation… We’ve bought my husband’s parents a home about a mile from us in our golf centric lake community so we can provide the support they need at 88 and 89. It’s a lot to juggle, but I’m so grateful that we’ve got the means to help our nearest and dearest as the Lord has so graciously blessed us. I’m already casting down the road to grandkids, thinking to lure these younger generations with boating, fishing, golf cart riding, etc. My goal is to be a “destination granny”.
Best wishes as you embark on this new season of empty nesting. The Lord always provides just what we need, when we need it!
Carrie
Carrie,
Wow! I loved every word you shared. Thank you for opening up about your journey. I love the way you gave all of the credit to the Lord for His provision. He is so good to us!
Lots of big changes coming your way, and I’m excited for you!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy,
Such a beautiful home and I can only imagine the memories.
Our path to downsize was initiated by my husband’s triple by-pass surgery. He’s thin, energetic and it was completely unexpected to find out how close he was to a heart attack. We raised our family far from our immediate families. That was our incentive to move and downsize. We felt, as we age, living near family – oh and grandkids, was the right move. We left a community where we lived, and raised our family, for over 30+ years to begin again in a new state with family nearby.
Nancy,
Thank you for sharing that! I feel like I know you since we’ve been friends on IG for so long, but I am so sorry I never knew this about you and your husband. We may end up near kids eventually, but right now they’re all in very different locations! We’ll see what the Lord has in store for us!
I’m so grateful for you and for our friendship! Thank you for leaving this comment!
xoxo
Suzy
Downsizing is a bittersweet time. My husband was already in his late 60’s, so we were older, kids were more settled, the decision for us made sense. I look forward to watch your path unfold. I know there will be beneficial information for me! xo
Nancy,
Aw, thank you! I so appreciate your encouragement, my friend!
xoxo
Suzy
My husband and I are going through this thought process right now. While we both love our current home, it doesn’t have a main floor bedroom. Both of us have gone through health issues in the past year, so a one level house is now a requirement. For me, knowing you need to move is the easy part. Where exactly to move to is harder. Both kids have moved to a different state but my aging parents are still in this state.
Tonya,
I totally relate to what you’re saying! It’s important to think that through! If you’re thinking of moving somewhere for retirement, I’d suggest googling or using chat GPT to help you! Put in prompts like, “Best cities for empty nesters to live” or “most affordable retirement spots for empty nesters who love the outdoors.” (You get my drift here!)
I love the idea shared in a comment above, where the couple listed out what they wanted in a place to live and started with that as they looked. (Ex. outdoor walking path, gated community, zero lot line, etc.)
Since we knew we wanted to stay nearby for the time being, we interviewed multiple realtors before we decided to go with the ones we picked (https://dpmfinehomes.com/). We know lots of realtors, but we didn’t want to use anyone we knew, for several reasons. We emphasized during the interview process that their ability to help us select our next location was make it or break it! We’ve been so pleased so far. Stay tunded for the rest of my story! We’re still in process!
Thanks so much for sharing and for taking the time to leave a comment. I’m truly grateful!
xoxo
Suzy
My husband and I are the parents of 5. Four of them are adults living independently and our “bonus” is a high school Junior. She wanted to live closer to her school and her friends and not in the large home outside city limits with its empty bedrooms. We agreed with her and we moved over the summer. We love our new space! It fits much better with our current stage of life.
Melessa,
Oh, thanks so much for sharing your story. With 5 kids, I’m sure downsizing and decluttering wasn’t easy! I am so glad to hear from someone on the other side that it was the right thing!
Thank you!!!
xoxo
Suzy
We moved from our home of almost 30 years a week ago today~ so hard emotionally and physically… but very happy it’s behind us now. Like you, it was time for us. Wishing you blessings as you venture into a new season in your lives!!🥰🙏
Michelle,
Aw, thank you for your encouragement! I’m so grateful for it!
xoxo
Suzy
I cant quite believe we are doing this at the same time, having had our kids weddings and moving away at the same times! Be it across the pond!
So looking forward to sharing this time. Lots of tears as well but as the saying goes ‘feeling sad after making the right decision does not mean that it wasn’t the right decision’. xx
Carole,
You are God’s gift to me, my friend! I am so grateful for you and your encouragement and support.
I love that saying! Thinking of you and taking comfort that we’re in it together!
xoxo
Suzy
Oh, my heart! Suzy, I feel for you! What a big, but brave step to take! I’m excited for all your future holds for you! My husband And I are in the ministry. We have moved about 6 times in 30 years. But now we are really thinking about moving back closer to my family, so I can be near my aging father and my sisters. (My beloved Mama passed 4 yrs ago) It is a huge decision. We want to continue to be in the ministry but have more time for travel & adventures…as you have said. There’s so much beauty in this time of our lives, isn’t there?! Thank you for sharing your heart! Can we to see what more you share in this series!
Amy,
Aw, thank you for your kind words and excitement on our behalf! It’s been – and continues to be – quite the journey!
Grateful to you for following along!
xoxo
Suzy
I just love the updates! Downsizing— “right-sizing”—is no small task, so congratulations to you and Bob on conquering this big step!
We made the same decision recently—our Dallas home sold in just two days, and we closed 17 days later. We’re now happily tucked into a townhome while we search for our next place.
As a Dallas realtor, my best advice is to stay very engaged in the home-buying process. Your realty team will show you what’s on MLS, and their “pocket listings”, but some of the best homes I’ve found—for clients and for myself—came from unexpected conversations at places like Sample House, church, or even the school pickup line. 😉
Take walks in your favorite neighborhoods, visit local parks and coffee shops, join the neighborhood book club, and let everyone you meet know you’re looking for a home in XYZ neighborhood. With limited inventory at certain price points, those personal connections can make all the difference—and they’re a wonderful way to meet future neighbors!
I’m so excited to follow along on this adventure with you. I prayed for the sale of your home and for the perfect place for you to land. This next chapter is going to be so much fun! Keep us posted!
Sweet Tina,
Thank you for weighing in and sharing your expertise and wise advice. You know I prayed for the sale of your home as well! I am so grateful for your friendship!
Your advice is so good and I really appreciate you sharing it here so everyone can benefit from your wisdom.
Love and hugs to you, my sweet sister!
Suzy
Suzy, thank you so much for taking us along on your downsizing journey! My husband and I have been in our large house where we raised our 2 kids and a pool and a yard to maintain for 30 years. I would love to downsize and go to a one story but as some of the others replied, we don’t know where to go!! Our kids are 30 and 40 minutes away here in Houston so we know we will not move very far away! My grands want us to keep our house because they love coming here! So pulling at my heart!! I just pray that God will let us know when it is time to down size and show us where we should end up!! I wish you and your husband all the best in your downsizing and moving and many blessings!!
Paula,
It’s a tough decision! I hope you explore your options and continue thinking it through! Not making a decision is a decision, so I’m sure this is weighing on you.
I’m so glad you’re enjoying this series, and it’s been helpful! Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy! We are also sort of downsizing from a two-story to a one story. I call this phase one. We two are going through many, many things from our kids childhood. Treasured artwork, notes and what not. I even had wedding cards from our marriage of 40 years ago. I took the time to read the cards and then I was ready to part with them. Our house was on the market for a week and we are currently in contract and scheduled to close on our house September 15, and we’ve already purchased a new home about a half a mile away because we love the neighborhood. Our kids live in the central coast of California so at this point we have the same number of bedroom so they have a place to land when they’re here. But I’ve given away so much stuff, and donated, and even Facebook has a great buy nothing Roseville site for our city. I’d rather give things away than sell it. I hope you find something beautiful and your house that holds all those memories will indeed be a memorable place for the next family.
Cheers to us for declutterong and letting go!
Christie,
Thank you for sharing your story! I’m so proud of you. This is not easy stuff we’re doing!
I love that you have a heart for donation. I’ve found that focusing on how you’re blessing others makes the process joyful instead of so sorrowful. I love that you’re finding that too!
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment and for sharing your story!
xoxo
Suzy
Hi Suzy!
We downsized from a large custom home in the Atlanta suburbs 3 years ago when my husband retired early. We moved 5 hours away to a very large 55 and older SC low country resort housing community with 3 golf courses and all sorts of amenities and clubs. We live in a tropical paradise where most people only vacation once a year if they are lucky. We miss our larger house and still pay monthly for two storage units full of furniture. More importantly, there is a real shortage of medical specialists here so we travel 5-6 hours roundtrip several times monthly to see doctors elsewhere. My appendix ruptured a month ago and I had an eye opening medical emergency hospital experience that has my husband and I both wondering if we should move closer to better doctors and hospitals. I am having surgery in a hospital 3 hours away next week where we are renting an airbnb to stay in during my post op recovery. Our two adult children are grown and living elsewhere and too busy with their own lives to help us in an emergency. Our lovely smaller coastal abode is very attractive and energy efficient but it is not large enough to host overnight guests comfortably. My suggestion is to consider your lifestyle and availability of high quality medical care in right-sizing your next home. New construction homes are more costly per square foot but they are energy efficient and modern. HOA dues are high in our resort community but the lawncare is included. Best wishes to you on your move.
Andrea
Andrea,
That’s excellent advice. We’re moving nearby, just to something smaller, because being near good medical care is crucial to me with an autoimmune disease. (I have lupus.)
I’m so sorry to hear about your medical crisis and I’ll be praying for you as you have your surgery.
Thanks again for your comment and advice. I’m so grateful!
xoxo
Suzy